Monday, September 23, 2013

The Power of Perception

Feng shui can be a bit of a mind game with ourselves.

What I mean by this is that our perception of what we see in our home is so much more important than the face value of something that we see.


Consider people walking into your home for the first time. As they look around they'll see pictures, pieces of art, knick-knacks, your favorite furniture, etc.

What they won't see is the deeper meaning any of these things have for you. It's not just a picture of Italy, it's a memory of when you and your entire family took a vacation to Venice. It's not just a Monet, but a representation of the painting class you took on Impressionism where you met a special friend. It's not just a set of porcelain figurines, but a connection to your grandmother who passed them on to your mother, who then passed them down to you.

This connection we have to the things in our environment becomes the basis for the energy in our homes. If we have positive connections to these things, we have positive energy. 

But there's more.

If you change the perception of something in your home, you change the energy. So if you have a beloved comfy chair given to you by your favorite uncle but your relationship with sours, that chair could suddenly become a constant reminder of that negative relationship -- it lowers your energy every time you look at it. 

This is actually a good thing. Especially in feng shui because specific areas in your home are associated with specific areas of your life. For instance, there's a place for family and there's a place for creativity and new projects. Let's say you have your family photos on the creativity/new projects wall. The family photos would logically go on your family wall, but you love the photos and you want to keep them on that creativity wall. 

Here's the solution: change your perception.

Instead of thinking of those pictures as simply old family pictures, they could be your foundation, your support structure, the people who have made you the wonderfully creative person you are today -- prepared to take that next step of your new venture or dive into that new creative endeavor.

Now you see not just your family photos, but the basis for how you will be successful on your creative path. It can be a powerful tool for you.

The Prosperity Bar
One of my clients was looking to enhance his prosperity space. We were able to find some great ways to do this on his first and second floor by adding to or modifying the space. In the basement, though, he had a beautiful bar with oak stools. On the surface, it may be difficult to see how a bar could support his prosperity. That's when it takes a little probing.

We talked about how he defined prosperity. Often people immediately think of money, but in reality it's what people want to do with their money that defines prosperity for them. This client loved to travel and specifically in the Mediterranean Region (especially Italy and Spain). He already had maps of these regions, so he agreed to place these next to the bar. I also recommended he include Spanish and Italian wines on his bar, and incorporate elements from taverns in Spain or Italy to extend this theme.

In our conversations, he also talked about wanting to have more people over because he loved to spend time with his friends, and make new friends. In fact he felt that his friendships were part of what made him feel prosperous as well. 

With this in mind, we were able to change the perception of the bar from simply a place to drink to a place that represented traveling to his favorite places and building lasting friendships. 

It just goes to show how important your own perception can be to lifting or changing the energy of a space. 

So next time you look around your home, consider what the things mean to you. If they make you feel good, great. If not, try changing your perception until it does. It can make all the difference.

Monday, June 24, 2013

Ahhh, the smell of it...

Walking down the streets of Colorado Springs this weekend, I had an opportunity to stop into a few shops. Each was entirely different from one another, but I was struck by the same thing as I entered – the smell.

I mean this in a good way.

In one shop, I entered and could clearly catch the scent of lavender. This was a shop with various essential oils, flower essences, soaps and related books on the topics. Lavender has a very soothing effect on us, helping to create an aura of peace in a space, which made perfect sense for this small shop and its wares.

In the other, the strong aroma was much earthier, but still sweet, which I recognized as Nag Champa incense. Tibetan wares filled the shelves and covered the walls. My daughter was especially drawn to the singing bowls and the caretaker even demonstrated a large 18-inch quartz crystal singing bowl tuned to the key of F (the heart chakra). Statues of dragons, lucky frogs, Kwan Yin and other Hindu gods, and colorful clothing  complemented the deep red, yellow and earth tones that blanketed the space. Nag Champa seemed the perfect match for this place, with its very grounding essence.

Although two very different establishments, one very light and the other earthy, they each used the same technique for setting the tone for their stores. We can do the same in our homes or in our individual spaces. Consider the home you walk into that has cookies baking in the oven. It’s hard not feel a sense of welcome and warmth. While we can’t all be baking every time company comes, we can use more subtle approaches with aromatherapy.

Aromatherapy uses essential oils, which are botanical extracts from various plants, to make that connection between our sense of smell and a positive, emotional experience. Studies have proven our sense of smell is most closely tied to our memories, so it can be a great tool for tapping into those positive associations we have with the past, but can also help establish new positive memories.

I prefer using essential oils to the chemically based options sold in the grocery and large retail stores because it’s a more natural approach and you are better able to control the strength of the scent you use to fill a room.

If you’re wondering where to begin, start with a diffuser. The most common are those with a small stand and a glass or metal bowl heated by a tea light. Add water and a few drops of the oil of your choice, let the heat of the tea light do its magic and the space will begin to fill with the gentle aroma (make sure you don't leave the candle unattended). 

Next, you should select an essential oil that you enjoy. If you don’t know which one, stores that sell essential oils will often have testers you can use to get a sense for the aroma.

As you’re selecting your oils, remember to consider the intention or feel you want for your home. Are you looking to have your home feel more balanced, more grounded, or more energized? There are so many options ranging from lavender to sage to lemon. Bottom line though, you should listen to your intuition. It’s the best guide you’ll have.

So if you’re looking to create a great first impression in your home, don’t forget to consider the sense of smell. It can set the tone for great memories to come.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

When In Doubt, Move It.

I asked my daughter recently how she would go about improving our deck. I told her I didn't think the lights worked well any longer and it just didn't feel as good as it once did. This was her response:

"You know what I do when I want a space to feel differently? I move things around."

I have to admit I felt a swell of pride when she said this. It was such a natural Feng Shui response. I remember when I was a kid, I would rearrange my furniture in my room every few months or so. It drove my mom a bit batty, but I knew I just needed a different feel in the space.

Now that I'm a Feng Shui consultant, I understand the impact of shifting things around in a space and why I needed to listen to my instincts on this even back then. When we're feeling stuck in our lives, there can be many reasons for it, but more often than not there's an indication in your home of what that is and why.

In Feng Shui, we use an energetic map called the Bagua, to connect aspects of our lives (e.g., career, relationships) with areas of our home.It allows us to pinpoint enhancements for specific aspects of your life.  When you feel stuck, there can be telltale signs of this in your home too, like a lot of clutter; but if the signs are not so evident, you can take my daughter's advice and move some things around.

The question becomes where do you start? I'd say first listen to your intuition. Where do you feel you should start? What room just feels like it needs to be changed? If nothing comes up, I'd say start with the entry to your home because this is considered the "mouth of chi" -- it's the place the energy enters your home and if there are blocks here, it can have an effect on the entire space. As you enter your home, do you notice anything that just doesn't feel right? Is there something you've been meaning to do in this space but just haven't gotten around to it? Well, now's the time.

Next, I'd recommend focusing on your office, which typically represents your career and prosperity. Does the desk feel right where it is? Are there book shelves that could be moved or better organized? What about your computer? Can it be moved to another place on your desk?

One more place to consider starting is your bedroom. This space represents your intimate relationships. How would it feel if you moved an end table or swapped out a lamp? What about shifting the bed slightly or moving the dresser to another corner? Even moving small items, like pictures, can make a difference.

Moving things around really is just a start in creating better feng shui for your space, but it will allow you to get a different feel in a room because you're changing the way energy is flowing in the space. You'd be surprised what a difference these shifts can have on not only a room but you, too. Enjoy the shifting!

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Summer? So Soon?


Summer is here! OK, not officially, but as kids do you remember marking your summer by the Solstice? Me neither, and my daughters are no different. They see summer starting in less than two weeks when the last school bell rings (although to be honest, I don’t even know if they have bells anymore, maybe it’s more of a buzz), and I think even our dog is feeling it.

In the adult realm of our house, we’re less excited about the speed with which summer approaches. It’s not that we don’t have great plans for the next few months; it’s that we have SO MANY great plans. The big trip is to Costa Rica for 10 days in July, but up until then we have a trip to Dallas for a long weekend, a trip to Colorado for a tae kwon do competition, a trip to my Dad’s where I’ll be driving a U-Haul back from Massachusetts and various other local events we’ll be attending, not the least of which is a 10-day Feng Shui certification course I’ll be leading starting in late August and a 2-day body, mind, spirit seminar for which I need to prepare to lead a half-day session in September.

Meanwhile, we have about 70 seedlings sprouting in our living room that need to get planted along with all the other yard work that keeps taunting us. 

So our girls’ excitement for the best summer ever is quickly becoming our panic that there’s no way we’ll be able to get everything done.

International trips, cross-country trips, local trips, family, friends, classes, seminar, yard work – all while maintaining some semblance of sanity. Ahhhh! And then we breathe.

That last part there, that’s the key. Breathing. I tell my clients, friends and families all the time, it’s about breathing. It’s the simplest thing to do but makes all the difference in the world. It allows us to center ourselves because we actually feel our body moving in and out, up and down. When we focus on our body it forces us to step outside of our mindset in the moment, and that moment can be exactly what you need to step back for a minute and take another look. A more objective look, and even a grateful look.

As I step back, I can realize how fortunate I am to be able to have such a packed summer. I can be grateful for my nine to five job that has allowed me to afford these things. I can be thankful for all the people in my life that care enough for me to want me to visit or travel with them. I can acknowledge all the great things in my life. And that’s why I breathe.

You may wonder what this has to do with Feng Shui. Translated, Feng Shui means wind and water. And if the goal of Feng Shui is to create a space that flows like wind or water, what better way to start do this than by internalizing this flow, breathing in this flow, and making it a part of you each day.

We’ll talk about water another day. 

Monday, January 21, 2013

The Flow of Life

Why in Feng Shui do we look at the flow of energy in a home? On the surface it is because the energy of our spaces affects how we feel while we sit in our favorite chairs, eat our meals and sleep in the comfort of our beds. On a deeper level, the flow reflects much more. It mirrors our inner world -- our emotions, our ideas, our hopes, our challenges.

When taken in this context, the clutter in one room becomes more than a mess that weighs on you every time you see it, but a symbol of a block to achieving your dreams you are facing within yourself.

Clutter,while just one Feng Shui challenge, is one of the most prevalent. Everyone has clutter, whether a basement full of boxes or a desk full of papers. It's also one of the most noticeable and greatest blockers of chi flow. Often the less noticeable chi influencers, the ones that we live with day in and day out without even realizing them to be an issue (e.g., empty walls, prevalent colors, large windows -- the list goes on), are the ones that can have the greatest impact on changing the flow of a space. Before making any changes though, it's important to understand how in fact you do get the energy to flow better.

First let's determine how the energy should flow. A river is a good metaphor for this. Consider a fast flowing river with many rapids, and hence rocks, to navigate. While this may be a kayaker's dream, if you had this kind of energy in your home, you may enjoy an initial adrenaline rush when you first arrive, but after a while it can wear you down. On the opposite spectrum is a river that barely flows at all. Sure it's good for a leisurely row on a sunny afternoon, but soon you'll find you haven't gotten very far, and a lethargic feeling may settle in so you don't feel like doing much of anything, much less focusing on your goals and aspirations.  

What you want to create is a flow somewhere in between. The chi should flow like a gentle meandering river, constantly flowing, not too fast and too slow.

How do you translate this to your home? The flow of energy can be initially determined by what attracts your attention. For instance, if you walk into your home and there is no immediate focal point, the energy can remain stagnant. The same goes for each room.

Once you have the initial focal point, what else attracts your attention? Is it many small objects throughout the room that don't seem to have a clear connection to one another? This can scatter the chi, sending it off in many directions while also speeding it up because there is no clear single focus. Perhaps there is a large piece of furniture that takes over the room. This can significantly slow the chi in a room.

The goal would be to have the energy in a room and a home circulate, always having something to draw its attention to keep the energy flowing. Hanging artwork or pictures on walls is a great way to keep the energy flowing. This doesn't mean a wall needs to be full to create great chi -- one beautiful piece you love is enough.

There are also many subtle ways to direct the chi, for instance through textures and colors. A wall painted in earth tones will typically slow down the energy of a space while bright colors will increase the energy. Consider the textures in the room -- a silver coffee table would support a smoother and quicker flow versus a shag carpet, which can be more grounding and slow the energy.

Feng Shui offers many options, all of which cannot be covered in a single blog post, for manipulating the flow of chi. Begin by looking around your home to identify chi blockers or other chi influencers. This small bit of detective work will help you to understand whether the chi is flowing like river rapids or a stagnant creek. Once you establish good chi flow in your home, you'll begin to see it reflected in your life.



Monday, January 14, 2013

The Journey at Home

I've walked this path many times. It speaks to me along the way. Sometimes through birdsong, other times through the rustling of leaves by small feet; but no matter how nature shares her stories, I always feel better after listening.

For me, this path epitomizes the old maxim, it's the journey not the destination. It's a good maxim as maxim's go, but the question becomes what do you do with it? Is it something you hear, acknowledge and then discard until you find another path in nature or get hit upside the head with its truth once again?

The answer? Make it part of your daily life. It's simple to do and you can be creative. Put a picture, like this one, in your home -- a reminder of the journey. Or, for me, I might hang a representation of nature and the feeling I have while on the path -- a leaf, framed in glass. Colors in nature can cover the walls in your home.

How would this help you live the maxim? They are all reminders, energetic reinforcement, that life can be about the journey, not the destination. As you surround yourself with these images, colors, aspects of nature, you're bringing in the stories of nature into your home. Then whether at home or in nature, you'll be able to hear the tales that have been told for generations, a sharing of journeys, not of destinations.